Saturday, March 1, 2014

I. Failed. Ulpan.

Well, there's a little more to the story. I wasn't able to take my final examination because I was out sick with the flu for the last week of class.  And I finally got "over myself" to be able to share my humiliating experience with potential new Olim, so you get a little insight to the reality of Ulpan.

Our class would be ending on 30 January. First we would have an Oral Interview with the Director of the Ulpan, and then 2 weeks later, our final written test.  Our teacher had coached us for a few days on the questions we would be asked by the Director, so that we could answer with confidence:

*What is your name?
*How old are you?
*What is your address/city?
*When did you make Aliyah?
*Are you employed? / What do you do?
* What do you like to do in your free time?
*Where would you like to live in Israel?
*Will you go on to take the next Ulpan level, or will you travel? 
*If you will travel, to where, and who will you visit?

Straightforward and simple, right?

No.  I arrive to the 3-5 minute oral interview.  I say Shalom.  She asks me my name.  I tell her.  She asks where I live.  I tell her.  She asks where I lived in the USA.  I tell her. Then she asks me WHY I made Aliyah.  (Not when).  I told her that I had many reasons.  She asked me to explain.  I told her I don't have the words to say my feelings in Hebrew, as we have not learned the vocabulary for that. 

She then asked me, "Ma Bat Yisrael?" 

Did I hear that right?  She asked me "What Daughter Israel?"  ??????   I said, "Slicha, ani lo mevina hashe'ala shelach.....od pa'am, bevakasha?" 

She leaned forward, and s-l-o-w-l-y and deliberately and somewhat sarcastically said again, "Ma     Bat      Yisrael?"

Ok.  Lama (why) would make sense.  Mi (Who) would make sense.  But MA????  (what).  The sentence did not make sense!!  If she was asking me how OLD Israel was (from statehood) she might have asked, "Bat Kama Yisrael?"  But that's not what she asked me.
I was dumbfounded.  I said that her sentence did not make sense to me, and therefore, I did not have an answer for her.

All of the speaking to this point was done in Hebrew.  (In Hebrew!!!)  At this juncture, she started speaking to me in English.  "You are not ready to take the final."


What?  Because I could not answer ONE question that made no sense? I had worked so hard for the last 4.5 months, and she fails me over one answer?  I later find out that the oral exam is 40% of my final grade.  To pass the written final, you needed to get a 69% to pass.  Because I am not a quitter, I still went to class even though I had no chance of passing the written because of failing the oral.

We spent a lot of time preparing for the test.  We even had a "mock" final that included all the sections that would be on the real deal.  It was 6 pages long, and we had 2 hours to complete it: 

*Two stories that we had to read and then answer the questions. 
*Multiple choice to select words from to complete the sentences. 
*Write a story about one of three themes suggested. 
*Changing verbs from present to past and to future.
*Writing out a small note (select from a thank you note or a congratulatory note)

Actually, I thought I did pretty good.  I know I didn't ace it or anything, but I felt that my answers were correct and complete to the best of my knowledge.  The whole class used the allotted time of two hours to complete it.  It wasn't easy by any means, but we all tackled the challenge.  That was on Thursday afternoon.

On Sunday, I woke up feeling fine.  But 20 minutes before I needed to leave, I started feeling strange.  Really dizzy and I had a fever.  But Ulpan was the driving force in my life, so out the door I went.  By the time I got to class, I alternated between flushed and then chilled, and my body felt like I had been run over by a truck.  It went downhill from there.  I had a headache, and I couldn't concentrate.  I couldn't wait for class to be over so I could go home and go to bed!!

Then our teacher handed us our mock finals.  I got a whopping 53%!!!  Oh My Gosh!!  This was devastating to me!  I always got straight A's in school....never had to study....retained almost everything I heard or read....and now I get 53% on this test that I've studied for almost 5 months for!!  It was insult to injury.  I went home and gave in to the illness and stayed in bed for 3 days straight.  Went to the Dr. with a fever of 103.9 (almost 40 degrees C!) He put me on antibiotics as I had a sinus infection and an ear infection.  Needless to say, I wasn't able to take my exit exam.

I am going to try and take the class again this Fall.  But this time, I will go to an evening class, because I am NOT a morning person.  I think this was 1/2 of my problem or battle.  I need 10 hours of sleep, and with Ulpan so early in the morning combined with my night owl tendencies, I was only getting 5 or 6 hours at night, and then a 2 hour nap in the afternoons.  Which still didn't give me all the sleep I require, and I was always tired.

Buyer beware!!  This class is "no picnic", as our teacher used to often say.  It's hard.  It's intensive.  It's all consuming.  It's fast paced and demanding.  Apparently there are people who actually DO pass the first time around. 

I am just not one of them! 

Wednesday, January 1, 2014

"Ali, Ali, Where Ya Be?!?" "Homework, Homework, My Destiny!"

Ah.....Ulpan-Aleph.  My nemesis. My love-hate relationship.

I had no clue how intense this language course would be.  If I had a shekel for every tear I've cried in frustration.......

I'm not writing this to discourage you. Just be aware that it will be the most intensive 5 months of your life!  I came to the class on the first day thinking that we were going to learn Hebrew on an elementary school level.  However, we are doing High School level work.  My Israeli friends saw the curriculum and were shocked.  Most had to bow out of helping me, because they weren't strong in the grammatical aspects of their own language. 

Class is 5 hours a day, 5 days a week, for 5 months.  Then I get home and have a minimum of 3 hours of homework.  It can be writing assignments, hand-outs, our online class site, or our textbook.  Usually, all 4. 

We are introduced to so many new words each day.  If I am busy writing them in my notebook, I may not hear the teacher translate the word into English.  (And half the time, there is no translation!) So I get home, and I have exercises to do with words I don't even know yet.  I spend more time on Google Translate than any other website!  This is part of the reason why it takes me 3+ hours to do my homework.

Today is 1.1.2014.  75% of the class took the day off after partying into the wee hours of the morning.  But the rest of us troopers dragged (drug?) ourselves in.  Class started with just 4 students and then blossomed to a whopping crowd of 9 by the 2nd hour. It was actually one of the best class sessions of all time...I really learned a lot.  Perhaps because of the smaller size?  More personal interaction?  I don't know, but if only every day could be like today....... 

The final test for our class is on 30 January.  We're all a little nervous as to whether or not we will be able to pass it.  And get this:  On Sunday, our teacher told us in Hebrew that "from here on out, the class will become really difficult".  We all looked at each other like, "Say WHAT?!?!?!"  If it 's more difficult than it is now, will any of us be left standing at the end of the month???

Our teacher showed her gratitude for our attendance by letting us leave an hour early, and, WITHOUT HOMEWORK!!  This is the first time since 28 August!! Whatever will I do with myself having a free afternoon and evening?!?!?   

I knew right away that I wanted to post on the blog explaining my absence.  I am still keeping notes in my iPod about topics to write about.  I just have to wait until I can come up for air (after Ulpan) to be able to express myself clearly....as I'm not doing right now! 

So!  :) Happy Other New Year's Day to you all.  All in all, 2014 started off great.  Great class.  No Homework.  Nescafe was on sale.  Bought dark chocolate.  Ate Homemade Chicken Noodle Soup.....and now, the pieces de resistance:  Homemade sourdough bread (my own culture) just went into the oven!  Mmmmmmmmm.  Wish I could share the aroma with you!!

Hopefully another update will be posted before 30 January!

Ali